Life Secrets from Chrissy Teigen’s Instagram

I Lived Like Chrissy Teigen Man Repeller Feature

Chrissy Teigen and John Legend are every kind of goals. The busy celebrity couple is success goals, humor goals, beauty goals, multi-tasking goals. All. The. Goals. They’re even goals when they don’t want to be goals. After the Grammys, Chrissy posted a Snap of John helping her take her necklace off while she drunkenly wobbled. When fans labeled it “relationship goals” Chrissy, queen of the clapback, was quick to take them to task.

Chrissy obviously wants us to have sane and rational responses to the perfection that is her relationship. She even opened up to Glamour about her struggle with postpartum depression, revealing that even when things look ideal, they can be challenging.

So, yes, they are real people, with real emotions. Not goals.

And yet there’s something irresistible about the way they live their lives online. Everybody knows that the picture we paint of our lives on social media is a skewed and highly curated one. But that never stops us from being seized with envy at every well-lit Insta.

What if every post that inspired me to longingly sigh “goals” wasn’t just something to discuss with my therapist, but a call to action? What if I used Chrissy and John’s social media life as a model of my actual life? Would my reality improve? Only one way to find out!


Just a typical press day with @mj_day for the launch of @si_swimsuit 2017!!

A post shared by chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) on

This is that thing when you don’t have anything to wear even though your closet is full so you sink to the floor, naked, and ponder life. While casually slaying. This is already me AF so I didn’t need to do much life modification. Admittedly, I don’t look as good as Chrissy Teigen. I made my husband put better lighting in our closet because clearly, that’s the problem.


Basketball with baby Luna

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John and Chrissy’s baby is, of course, perfection incarnate. As a person who has no children but yet still struggles to get my life together, I’m amazed that they’re able to maintain busy careers while simultaneously raising a child. Not to mention that their daughter, Luna, is always dressed to the nines. After seeing this post, I made a note to talk to my therapist about babies with better wardrobes than mine. More importantly, though, I made a note to take time away from work to enjoy the things I like with the people I love. Preferably whilst wearing chic pink headphones.


Two things that will make me dance: cheese and @spikelsb. Watch @raylewis vs @tonygonzalez tonight at 10/9c!!

A post shared by chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) on

The problem with most offices is that they don’t have enough melted cheese. Does your office have a nacho machine? If the answer is no, then your office is problematic. My office has no nacho machine and my office is frequently my living room so both home and work are problematic. I’m shook. The lesson we can take from this post is that carbs make every office better. I purchased some Tostitos and cheese dip and my day improved immediately. It’s also worth noting that Chrissy is killing it in the “dressing for the job you want” department. No matter what work I’m doing, the job I want can always be best described as “near food.”


Practicing for La La with Luna

A post shared by John Legend (@johnlegend) on

What’s most amazing about John and Chrissy is that they aren’t content to rest on their laurels; they’re constantly innovating their work and art. No matter what one is putting out into the world, one should always push oneself to be better. It’s clear from this post that the pursuit of excellence is much easier when done in front of a wall of your own awards. I pulled out a participation ribbon I got for playing in the softball league a few years ago and taped it to the wall. And you know what? I actually felt better.


In perhaps the best tweet ever, on Valentine’s Day Chrissy posted a video of John tearing into a delicious breakfast burrito. There’s no better way to celebrate your love than with cheesy carbs. I am for this. I immediately demanded that my husband and I get breakfast burritos even though it was about 7 p.m. when I saw this. We did anyway. I have no regrets. #BestLifeEver

R. Eric Thomas is a playwright and person on the internet. He writes a daily humor column called “Eric Reads the News” on Read his Sunday Scaries diary for MR here; Photo by Gilbert Carrasquillo/GC Images via Getty Images.

R. Eric Thomas

R. Eric Thomas

R. Eric Thomas is a playwright and person on the internet. He writes a daily humor column called “Eric Reads the News” on

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