Emma Watson, busy dealing with the lovely people who claim she’s a fake feminist because her Vanity Affair cover depicts cleavage, recently detailed her head-to-toe beauty routine for Into the Gloss. Unsurprisingly, the interview has gone viral. Probably because Watson is famous for being an adorable 10 year old who, 16 years later, still looks like an adorable 10-year-old. But also mature and beautiful? I don’t know. I really couldn’t tell you why I know the exact shade of her eyes off the top of my head when I can’t do the same for almost anyone else, including people I know personally.
Aside from fulfilling my basic voyeurism quota for a Tuesday, the interview is also just plain good. You have to wade through (or delight in, depending on who you are) all the sustainability talk to get to the weird stuff, but it’s there. It genuinely surprised me seven different times! That’s more times than during my commute home last Thursday when a man literally peed on my train and less times than when I watch any single episode of The Young Pope. Do with that what you will. Here they are:
1. Emma made Beauty and the Beast makeup artists leave her freckles visible to inspire befreckled pubescent teens.
I just made up the word befreckled, call me Shakespeare. “I think the look of natural skin is beautiful,” she says. “I didn’t want to get blanked out!” This is cool, but can I please ask who is anti-freckle? I’ve been confused about this since Kylie Jenner “revealed” she has freckles last year like it is a rare disease. Someone pls explain.
2. She uses a bronzer that has self-tanner in it.
“Vita Liberata [does a] self-tanning bronzing powder that actually tans you slightly while you’re wearing it. It sounds like a lot, but it’s actually super, super natural,” she says.
I’m not going to lie, this reminds me of 2-in-1 shampoo/condition combos but now I want to try it, so.
3. She doesn’t “buy into” masks.
“I’ve never been big on masks! I guess I don’t totally buy into it.”
ATTN: EMMA DOESN’T BUY INTO MASKS.
That’s all. It surprised me, okay? Just being honest.
4. Emma takes between one and three baths a day.
When I found out my old coworker took a daily bath (like in a tub), I asked her a new question about it every single morning. I needed every logistic. Suffice it to say, baths deeply confuse me. Emma says she takes calls from the bath and that nothing bad ever happens there. These draws seem salient, but I do wonder about the whole bathing-in-your-own-filth thing.
5. Emma uses a natural deodorant that you scoop with your hands.
I am extremely suspect of natural deodorants after I was forced to use a bunch of samples last year (my Old Spice chemical stick ran out) and I had B.O. for a week straight. She claims Soapwalla’s Deodorant Cream “actually works,” but I have my doubts and I take issue with the scooping.
6. She’s bleached her upper lip since she was nine!
“I’ve been bleaching my top lip since I was nine,” she says. (Told you.) She also wants to destigmatize certain beauty practices which are deemed un-Instagrammable. Saintly.
7. Most importantly, she oils her pubes.
“I use Fur Oil. I’ll use that anywhere from the ends of my hair to my eyebrows to my pubic hair. It’s an amazing all-purpose product,” says Emma. This is so Shailene-Woodley-sunbathing-her-vagina and I love it.
Photo by Stephane Cardinale – Corbis/Corbis via Getty Images.