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Reformation Just Launched Bridal and I NEED IT

Cool. Well Happy day to you, too. Here I am having a brain freeze over the official launch of Reformation Bridal and there you are doing NOTHING AT ALL TO HELP ME. I can’t buy anything until Thursday! I told my heart it could have what it wants whenever it wants it and now it thinks I lied. What do I do?

tenor

*Someone in the comments section whispers, “Calm the hell down. Thursday will come soon.”

Don’t tell me what to do! While we wait in a pool of panic but before we send SOS texts to all of our friends getting married this summer that we can’t come, let’s take a collective deep breath and play a game of hypothetical ownership. It will put our nerves on ice thanks to the ASMR-like effect of dress scrolling.

Priority #1

(via Reformation)

I need this tiered confection more than I have ever needed any FROCK in my whole life. It’s a little risky for a wedding because it’s so white, so I might buy it, take the temperature of a few brides then wear it to crash some nearby proms in the meantime.

Priority #2

(via Reformation)

It is high time we take back the red dress. The emoji dancer has domineered it long enough. Won’t you join me?

Priority #3

Reformation-SS17-Bridal-Man-Repeller-insert-01

The black version shows the front, the green version shows the back — just really confused about where the photo is that shows me wearing it? This here gown is exactly what you’re looking for when the invitation says something ambiguous like, “casual fancy black tie beach.”

Plus I want everything in the slideshow above, including the bride-specific one so that I can trick the registry people at Barney’s, AND, this one with the bow in the back.

Okay that’s it for me. Tell me which waitlisted dress you’re getting, then let’s coordinate our wedding calendars this summer so we don’t all show up to the same one in the same thing. Or should we? Alternative bridal party!

Photos via Reformation; feature collage by Maria Jia Ling Pitt.

Amelia Diamond

Amelia Diamond

Amelia Diamond is a writer, creative consultant, and Man Repeller alumnus living in New York City.

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