There are so many things you could have been busy with this month:
– Back-to-school syndrome
– Resenting 80-degree weather in your Fall Look
– Debating the merits of candy corn
– Combing petfinder.com just to keep your options open
– Wondering the point of it all
– Helping costumed dogs cross the street
– Getting lost in an Instagram black hole; denouncing Instagram
– Feeling bad for not texting back
– Waffling on your Halloween costume
– Dismantling the patriarchy
It’s a hectic time of year, I understand. Who has time to read the internet? You have a mouth to feed (yours, possibly others) and a mind to care for (yours, possibly others); I’d never ask you to stay abreast of all the Man Repeller goings-on while bearing the weight of earthly existence. That said, we published some good stuff in October that could possibly make your life better and/or delight you at the very least. So maybe treat yourself, don’t trick yourself (that’s a thematic joke), to a leisurely scroll through the below top 10 stories from this past month.
The below guide is not overly interested in the zodiac’s stereotypical career paths. As my Pisces friend once said: “If I read one more blog that tells me to become a marine biologist, I’m going to scream.”
There’s a difference between believing that you’re beautiful because people tell you that you are and knowing you’re beautiful no matter what people say. There’s a difference between accepting a body that gains weight every summer and taking pleasure in the versatility of such a body.
Knee socks, khaki Bermuda shorts, a button-down and a cardigan is pretty much the perfect outfit for transitional temperatures. My evidence for this assertion stems from the fact that my knees are the only part of my body that don’t seem to freak out when confronted with a chilly breeze.
It wasn’t until a few years ago that I changed my tone. I fell into an eyelash extension addiction that more or less robbed me of my finances and later, my actual lashes.
After closely perusing all 87 items, I’m ready to employ my combination of shopping expertise, gut instinct and spidey senses to predict exactly which ones are going to sell out the fastest.
It seems like expectations around sex are at a tangled all-time high — it should be good and frequent, but exciting and varied — and the topic of how much sex people are having has become something of a litmus tests for satisfaction in monogamy. Unfortunately, it’s a barometer that offers pressure and quotas in lieu of solutions.
I’ve already restructured my a.m. routine to combine the perfect blend of Barack Obama and Jennifer Aniston. My productivity and television ratings have since increased. Given that Successfuls have deemed mornings so important, I figured a better pre-bed routine might help me wake up on the right side of it.
Chunky, grubby and unflattering, they are the ultimate 80s movie nerd shoes — and yet “everyone” is wearing them. Balenciaga’s much-hyped Triple S sneaks, described on one comment forum as “an old ass pair of shoes my mum keeps in the garage,” will run you close to $800, keep selling out online and have been ripped off by Zara.
As a consumer, fashion is distinctly fun right now. The ability to discover and experiment is at an all-time high, and the trends that designers delicately planted this season, like bulbs in the soil of our imaginations, spoke to that sentiment of individualism and delight.
I hate that when Ryan Reynolds looks at Blake, he wears the expression of pure, unadulterated joy I reserve for when my cat reciprocates my love. I hate their perfect smiles, comprised of perfect teeth, indenting their perfect faces as they laugh, drunk on the mutual affection of a thousand love stories.